Polly

Writings and Witterings

Night Club

19 Comments

A little Noir to get us going …

Half-hooded eyes flit the room,
from under his trilby,
weighing up the showgirls,
looking at the
diamond-patterned legs
that go up to their armpits.

Attitude: bored.

Other trilbies nod as he enters,
they are waiting
impatiently,
shuffling their spat-covered shoes,
pulling at their waistcoats,
buying last minute beer and chasers.

Voices rise as the room becomes fuller.
The band, nine men strong, riffle
through the cream-coloured music sheets;
black ant notes
visible from the bar.
They too are impatient.

From the back of the stage, shouts:
‘Get your hands offa me, I’m going on.’
Ears wag toward the stage curtain, but
the rejoinder cannot be heard.
She swings the curtain back dramatically,
see how it swishes as she makes her entrance.

Her eyebrows arch and we
can’t help but notice,
under the makeup,
bruises.
We know who gave them to her,
she will kill him one day.

Then the man in the trilby at the top
of this story,
remember him, half hooded eyes
that flit the room?
Well, he’ll be onto it when she does it.
The cynical hard-boiled type; always there first.

Polly Robinson © 2013

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19 thoughts on “Night Club

  1. Hi-hi, this one’s for me – I do love a bit of noir! I like how the trilby comes to symbolise the whole man.

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  2. Ha! Marina, trilbies have a way of doing that in Noir … 🙂

    Glad you enjoyed it, I’m trying to catch up the few days I’ve missed 🙂

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  3. I pictured Bogart and Bacall in this 🙂 Excellent!

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  4. this is awesome, you really nailed the atmospherics

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  5. Ooh, a little dark chill to start off the weekend. I like it. 🙂

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  6. Polly, true noir, a film that plays again and again in my head, directly by Ida Lupino… The tragic heroine/vamp/slut (very noir), the abuse (so sad) and the trilby, which I didn’t know was a style of hat until today! Congrats on teaching me, as always, something new and interesting. This is one helluva write, Polly! Amy

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  7. Sorry to be so slow to catch up here Polly. But loving the narrative here and the sense of place and time…

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  8. Love it – real atmosphere and so visual – feeling the sleaze 🙂

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